Following on from the devastating news that our dynamic duo Shinji & Robin had both died while on international duty, we just didn’t know how, as a team we would recover.
We welcomed The Pie-Eaters to Old Trafford and spent the first 45 minutes in mourning at our bereavement. At half-time a tearful Chicharito noticed Robin hiding behind the physio table while Scholes was dazzled after spotting Shinji running above the stadium exquisitely stepping from one rain drop to another. It turned out, despite United fans across the world thinking otherwise, they had lesser injuries than you may incur from a medium sized sneeze! All cheerful and out of mourning United won 4-0 with debut goals from Little Nicky (not the son of Satan played by Adam Sandler) and Büttner (the actual son of Satan).
Elsewhere it was nice to get the answer to the big question; Can a bunch of egotistical overpaid mercenaries do it on a tepid Saturday afternoon in Stoke? The answer is clearly no. Another question nobody gives a crap about; Will the handshake happen? I don’t care if they get their little fellas out and start sword fighting, it’s important not to waste all the excitement on a pointless pre match handshake so the actual match isn’t a terribly boring 0-0 between the Rentboys and the Rentboys-lite!!
Being known as the Black-Cats it seemed Sunderland cared nothing for Liverpool or sentiment as they made it 4 games without a win for Buck Rodgers, who if he carries on like this he may become my favourite Dippers manager since Kenneth the furniture whisperer.
John’s Burning Question:
As it transpired TNT led his team to a victory at the weekend while bending did not. Liverpool have now suffered their worst start to a season since 64BC when they finally won their 6th game against Pontius Pilot FC after a dubious penalty. Sack PLC? No way, he needs at lesst until January when Di Matteo will probably replace him after being released by Chelsea.
Sack Bending Rodgers? No thanks. He is creating a situation funnier than old ladies slipping on icy pavements
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What gang of utter morons you Manure are. You have the intelligence of a snail walking on salt thinking it may taste good.